If It Weren't Fer Bad Luck, I'd Have No Luck At All

Gloom Despair and Agony OOOOOOOOOOh me!!

I need to figure out youtube so I can load the video of Hee Haw singing that in here!!
http://www.jibjab.com/view/150392

I feel like the luckiest unlucky person there is!!
Here are some examples:

1. I am unable to conceive..........however, after spending $15k I have a beautiful daughter
2. I had a terrible liver disease. I lived after fulfilling my two worst nightmares...I gave myself shots, and my hair mostly fell out
3. I got fired from a job........three days later I got a job offer
5. I just lost two really big acounts.............I haven't found the silver lining yet!!!